Stake conference

Dad n the kids did a Tongan number.

i havent posted in 3yrs! feeling so down on myself. have fought for over 20yrs with one of my husbands weaknesses. makes me feel like the ugliest person ever. its probably not right but i feel like when i try to do better, he does not. satan is always working on us. he goes about his days as if it's normal. i sleep endlessly hoping not to wake up. i dont want my kids to be damaged as i was as a teen when my parents split up. however, this is the hardest for me as i have to fight the thoughts "this will never end. i am too tired to do this again" i tho0ught everything was ok between us as usual but it was not. i had uneasy feelings as i would wake and he was not next to me. the other day he took my son at 730am and my daughter to an appt at 11am but he couldnt cover for what happened between those hrs. in the eve i tried to look at his phone when he pulled it away. then i knew my feelings were not myth. i have nightmares sometimes that he is hiding things. my nightmare has come to life. i am suppose to say a talk tmrw but i already texted bishop to let him know that hakeai will say the talk instead of me. i havent feel this lonely ever. i know my kids can feel it. last night the girls went to their cousins sleepover at a hotel and i felt so ta'elata. God has way more faith in me than i do.