Struggle within myself

in 2010 I was in a state where I knew I was meant to do more than take ph calls for airline.  so my husband supported me in going back to school for a nursing degree. we spent thousands of dollars to go through my courses for prerequisites. I was even accepted to their program to start in 2012 but something inside of me was not feeling good about take the plunge. I was looking at the time I spent studying vs spending with my kids who are growing way too fast. why would I study and not spend time with them and then have an airline job where I wouldn't be able to go anywhere.  the time we have here on this earth is so short as well as the time the kids might wanna hang with me that I couldn't do it.  I ended up declining the program as much as I love to learn and go to school. the right thing felt like it was to be with my kids. I remember walking into Ofa and Lua's home with all their kids. they didn't have much but they were no doubt happy because Lua was there.She is such a spectacular mom that I don't have the words to describe her and how her kids are. they've come to my home and cleaned when they were here to see gma.  I cant believe their talents. something I want for my own family.

this past summer me and my kids spent a few days in Honolulu. we didn't have much but we were so excited to say that we were on vacation and were able to fly.  on top of that I am thinking the price of my fare would've been additional to my pay from ua.  :)  sometimes the ideas of the world or what others tell us is so noisy that we cant hear what the Spirit is telling us to do.  as much as it would've been great to be a nurse I am happy where I am at.